What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
My balls are so social today.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
