he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
When are your genitals available?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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