Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
