JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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