I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
