Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
