Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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