Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
