dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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