Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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