I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
