is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
