Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
