we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
