I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize