So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
