Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
