i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
