9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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