He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
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You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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