On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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