id be glad to
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
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