Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
