There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize