GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
