yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
