I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Did you just see the Batmobile???
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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