My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
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