You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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