He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
