Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
