he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
