a queef is a wish your heart makes.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
