these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
