i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
