im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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