I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
