I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
