dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
