dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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