I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize