How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
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