had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
