i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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