But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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