READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
