Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
