I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
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The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
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I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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