dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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