That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Need sex. Gaining weight.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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